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I'm not sure officer. After 100mph I'm too busy weaving through traffic and I'm too scared to look down and find out how fast I'm going.;)
 

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Sorry i was going so fast, but your wife said she wanted me there A.S.A.P.
 

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What NOT to say.......

Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going?"
What not to say: "Well if you think im gonna tell you, you've got a donut hole for a brain!":twofinger :D
 

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Officer: "Do you know how fast your were going?"
What Not to Say: " I was hoping you could tell me, you're the one with the damn radar gun."

Officer: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
What Not to Say: " Because you're lonely."

:D
 

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You know, you should let me go seeing as how my tax dollars pay your salary....dickhead.:twofinger

Note: They really like the dickhead part:D
 

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So this cop pulls a guy over for doing 93 in a 60, and he is just giddy with excitement because he knows he has the guy by the short hairs. When the cop approaches the driver's window, the driver calmly rolls it down and asks "Can I help you officer?" The cop tells the driver what he was clocked doing and asks where he was going in such a hurry. The driver tells him he is on his way to work at the hospital. The cop asks if he is a doctor and the man replies "No, I am a rectum stretcher." The cop, puzzled, asks what that means. The man says "Well, I put one finger in, then another and I start to stretch. You would be surprised, you can stretch an anus about six feet." The cop, surprised, asks "what on earth would you do with a six foot a$$hole?" The man pauses for a moment and says "Give him a radar gun and make him a cop"
 

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spicersh said:
You know, you should let me go seeing as how my tax dollars pay your salary....dickhead.:twofinger


Officer's response to that: "So, I finally get to meet the self-righteous piece of crap who pays my salary, huh...How about a friggin' raise....dickhead.

Oh, and since it is such a great personal pleasure meeting someone of such self-importance, I'll need your autograph right here...and on this one...and this one...AND this one too...dickhead.

...and don't forget...you whiny-assed, low-salary-payin', ungreatful-piece-o'-crap, lothesome-reprobate you...Have a friggin' WONDERFUL day...

..dickhead"
 

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you: nice gun!
officer: thanks?
you: wanna see mine:D


You: so umm..officer do you have to point that gun at your wifes head to get her off:twofinger
 

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ZZ-R1200 said:



Officer's response to that: "So, I finally get to meet the self-righteous piece of crap who pays my salary, huh...How about a friggin' raise....dickhead.

Oh, and since it is such a great personal pleasure meeting someone of such self-importance, I'll need your autograph right here...and on this one...and this one...AND this one too...dickhead.

...and don't forget...you whiny-assed, low-salary-payin', ungreatful-piece-o'-crap, lothesome-reprobate you...Have a friggin' WONDERFUL day...

..dickhead"
Don't bitch about the pay if you choose a crappy career :twofinger
 

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Bobas said:


Don't bitch about the pay if you choose a crappy career :twofinger
LOL...I never bitched about the pay...but it sure shut up the "I pay your salary" types...

and crappy career? Please!!! I couldn't believe they paid me to have that much fun...
 

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ZZ-R1200 said:


LOL...I never bitched about the pay...

...and crappy career? Please!!! I couldn't believe they paid me to have that much fun...
I know what you mean, I have a great career, and it ALMOST pays my bills. :crying:
 
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