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Discussion Starter #1
From you experenices how did your parents take you getting a bike. I have in the passed mentioned to my parents that I would like a bike and they have said stright up no and its not a good idea.

Anyway here is my situation, I'm out on my own 100% they don't support me in any monteary way. I live about 8 hours from them. I have to go to my home town this comming up weekend to fight a ticket I got in my truck back in November. Also I have to go back up to NY for my mom retierment dinner a few more weeks from now. So I'm going to take the bike on this trip, espically with gas the way it is.

Just trying to figuer out what is the best way to tell them and what things I can say to them to let them know that this is something I enjoy.

A little more background Dad has two goldwing in the garage right now, he only ride once in a while but both of them used to ride just about everyweekend. Dad and I used to ride dirt bike togeather, Dad also took me on many trips on the goldwings.
 

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You'll just have to be honest and first let them know you are now riding a motorcycle regularly (primary transportation?). Part of the problem will be that you are on your own now, and they may still occasionally pull out the "parent card". They only have power to tell you what to do as long as you let them. Also, if they are providing any funding for anything you are involved in, they can always pull that from you if you don't do as they wish. If they have (or do) ride, they must have some safety concern with how responsible you'll be, and not with motorcycling in general. You need to show them that you are grown-up and will be responsible. That also means that you will have to grow up and be responsible (if you aren't already). Don't be a squid and don't get tickets, because those are the things that will prove to them you are not adult enough to ride by yourself unsupervised. Since your Dad rode with you before, I have to believe he thinks it is cool to ride, but maybe for you, not without his supervision. He has to be convinced (and your ma) that they have little or nothing to worry about now that you have grown up and take this seriously. Good luck and hope that helps.
 

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I am befuddled that you have not told your parents sooner or even as you were seriously thinking of getting into m/cing.

Obviously m/c riding is in the blood of your family what with Mother & Dad riding Goldwings, with him taking you out on rides & the dirtbike riding.

My parents never rode a m/c or had any interest in m/cs yet at 15 yrs of age they knew I was into m/cing.

True one is, my father forced to retire due to a heart problem & HE asked me if he could ride a vintage LE Velocette I owned at the age of 55 & & rode it till 61 yrs of age.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
I really didnt decide to get a street bike untill late last summer about the time I joined the board here. At time I was 25 now I'm 26. I have only one speeding ticket that I'm going to go fight in NY that is the reason for going up there this weekend and telling the parents. Sometimes things go astry and we will see how this ticket works out 80 in a 55. That is in my truck. Hopefully I can get it reduced and it will not affect my insuracne rates to much. As far as the rest of my driving reccord its not perfect but. I have never had any points, couple of accidents I had where other fault and no fault.

I have a weird relationship with my parents. We seem to have differnet views on a lot of things. One of the reasons why I could not stand living with them at more at the age of 25.
 

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My parents never negotiated at all it was either yes or no. Neither of them have ever rode or been a passenger on a bike ever. I had the money for a bike in Highschool from cutting grass and bricklaying. They said no and I respected that.

Fast forward 5 years i am now financially independent and do what i want. I got my bike and gear between my monthly visits up to their house. I just pulled up on my bike and walked in with all my gear on unannounced "i have a key" .

Well my mom cryed a little and it was over in 30min instead of some week long debate.

Since then i taught my dad how to ride a bike and my mom in a church parking lot. They are totally cool with it now, they just asked that i give them a call and say hi after a long ride.
 

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My dad got me into it because I couldn't afford to buy a car and my parents didn't want to buy one for me. So he taught me how to ride his bike that didn't get much use until I got to it. Otherwise I don't think that I would be riding today.
 

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Having my parents in another part of the world, i really didnt bother telling them i got a bike. I think i mentioned it later, but it was well understood that if there was an objection, i wasnt going to listen to it. what can i say, we are far from a close family. Yours seems like it is, and so i do not recomment my approach.

Instead of telling them you have a bike, maybe you should start by telling them about your "new" jacket. you know the one that has all the armor to protect you from pavement. after all i am sure their main concern is your safety, and if you can assure them you arent looking to get yourself killed they'll just have to live with you making your own decision.

Good luck with your ticket, around here they dismiss the first one, and after that offer an option of paying times an a half and having a 30 day "probation" period. if you get no tickets during that time, you have nothing on your record. i am on my second probation period in 5 years.
dont know if you can get anything like that around there, but good luck anyway.
 

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Hehe, I don't think I would worry abot it riding is in your blood.

Luckily I never had to worry abot "The Talk" My father got me my first bike 50cc I think when I was 4. "Against my mothers conscent"

I've been riding ever since. I am now 32
 

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I was 36 before I got my first bike and still caught hell from my mother, despite the fact that my brother owns one and has for many years. Her big reservation was that it was a sportbike, whereas my brother has a Honda Shadow; a nice bike, but not for me. She's a beautician and had talked to someone who's hair she had cut that had said "sportbikes are dangerous." Well, that was all she needed to hear; seems anything that she hears from a client while cutting his/her hair is gospel.

Anyway, even though you've moved out and are making it on your own, it sometimes takes many years for some parents to stop relating to their offspring as children. Let's see, I moved out and got married when I was 24, had the first kid at 27 and I can still remember them having trouble treating my wife and I as adults. It's 10 years later now; I think they finally figured it out sometime between the 2nd house and the 3rd kid. Her parents weren't as bad, though. They may not have agreed with everything we did, but were certainly willing to let us fall on our faces. They were our mistakes to make and we learned from them.

My point in all of this is, at some point, you have to stand up to your parents and make it clear that you are a responsible adult and can make your own decisions. They don't have to agree with them or even like them, but they do have to live with them. That's more easily said that done for some people, I know from experience.

If I were 25 or 26 as you are now, EdgeRanger, I'd gear up and ride the thing right up to the back door. Don't act as if you are seeking their permission, because that puts them in control of the situation. Just make it clear this is part of who you are. If they have saftey concerns or whatever (part of why I said gear up) address them. Don't go in looking for a fight either, though, because you don't want the situation to explode on you.

I mean, if you'd bought a new sports car, would we even be having this conversation?

Does any of this help?
 

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Discussion Starter #10
Thanks guys for all your advice. I'm guess I'm more worried for them and how they will react to it. I know there isn't anything they can do about it. I guess I'm just looking to make the best of it and not have them worry, and not give them a heart attack. I beleive that the time I will be getting home, only my dad will be home, I hope that way it will be just him to talk to first and I think becuase he still rides a little bit not much he will be more understanding then mom. I'm not sure I may let him tell mom and not be there when he does it. We will see again thanks. I guess I'm just nevous for them. IDK this is very weird, i guess it kind of freeks me out more then reading about people getting messed up on bikes and what not.
 

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Do what I did... move out at 17, join the military, get a bike, get married....well, maybe don't get married ;) then catch sh*t from both the wifey, AND the parents!!! Ha ha ha
 

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i had that situation last october, im was 21, in college, not 100% financially independent, i got a bike using MY money and my parents found out, i ended up sellin the bike...

I graduated in may, right now im volunteering but once i get a job i'll prolly get another bike and tell my parents, if they can't deal w/ it, tough

i had my bike for a few months, i was content in not tellin my parents cause i knew i was gonna catch some hell

you sound like a big boy, im sure you can handle it:2cents:

*side note, my mom has made some friends that ride :D , so hopefully she will be able to handle it alittle better this time around
 

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I bought mine as a college graduation present to myself. I think I mentioned it in passing to my parents that I was thinking about buying one. They weren't thrilled, but decided they really couldn't bitch at me or say no because 1.) I was not financially dependant on them and 2.) They used to have bikes and I think they wish they still did. They found out I bought one for sure when I rode up to their house on it. They took it pretty well actually. Dad wanted to ride it and like an idiot I let him, thank god he didn't dump it. Mom said she would only go for a ride on it if it had a sissy bar, but at the same time she refused to watch me ride off on it when I left. :laughing:

Oh well, tell them however you want to. They don't have to agree with everything you do, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. You have to cut the umbilical cord sometime. :D
 

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i got my first bike when i was 12 and rode it home and parked it in my folks backyard. my dad was pissed and stole my keys and hid them. a couple weeks later we were on vacation in VT and my mom brought to my attention that there were some guys talking about bikes so i went over and chatted with them. one told me how to hotwire it and that was the straw that broke the camels back. WAS HE PISSED! that bike got totalled by a friend of my brothers at a party he threw.

my second bike was an old suzuki death trap of a machine and both my folks hated it so my dad "accidentally" backed over it with a company truck. i was 15. at 17, a friend let me "take care" of his bike. becuase the bike didn't officially belong to me, my dad couldn't do anything to it. i "took care" of that bike for 5 years. i gave it back to him when i moved out at 23. bought a honda at age 25 and decided at 28 to actually ride legally so i went out and got my license.

so long story short, i didn't tell them, i showed them.
 

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monkey said:
i got my first bike when i was 12 and rode it home and parked it in my folks backyard. my dad was pissed and stole my keys and hid them. a couple weeks later we were on vacation in VT and my mom brought to my attention that there were some guys talking about bikes so i went over and chatted with them. one told me how to hotwire it and that was the straw that broke the camels back. WAS HE PISSED! that bike got totalled by a friend of my brothers at a party he threw.

my second bike was an old suzuki death trap of a machine and both my folks hated it so my dad "accidentally" backed over it with a company truck. i was 15. at 17, a friend let me "take care" of his bike. becuase the bike didn't officially belong to me, my dad couldn't do anything to it. i "took care" of that bike for 5 years. i gave it back to him when i moved out at 23. bought a honda at age 25 and decided at 28 to actually ride legally so i went out and got my license.

so long story short, i didn't tell them, i showed them.
:laughing: 16 years of riding with no license! Priceless! And I felt bad for getting my permit and letting it expire, having to get another permit and wait the 30 days to take the riding test. :laughing:
 

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I started out being a curb monkey at 19, and neither of my parents really ever mentioned anything about it.

When I decided to get my license at 20, my mom was all for it and my dad threw a hissy fit - I believe I got the "We're going to have to scrape you up with a spatula!" comment on more than one occasion. :rolleyes:

At the time I was nearly 100% financially dependant on my parents.

By the time my first bike was purchased, I was 24, engaged and as my parents put it "Someone elses' problem". :laughing:

I think I am pretty lucky because my parents might voice their opinion on things, but once over 18, it was my life and they weren't going to blackmail me financially or emotionally.

Which brings me back to the OP - if you are over 18 and financially independant, it's really none of your parents business what you do (or don't do) with your life and your money. If they have an issue, tell them their opinion is dually noted and do what you darn well please anyhow. Crying, anger or any other negative emotion (except for a briefly stated concern about your well being) is, in fact, emotional blackmail and totally unacceptable, IMO.

Just my :2cents: :2cents: :2cents: ('cause $.02 just isn't enough for me!)
 

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spicersh said:
:laughing: 16 years of riding with no license! Priceless! And I felt bad for getting my permit and letting it expire, having to get another permit and wait the 30 days to take the riding test. :laughing:
Dude, it's even worse in the military. In order to be able to ride on base, we HAVE to have the motorcycle safety course under our belt. Also, whenever we ride, we "HAVE" to wear long sleeves, boots, a full face helmet, and ...drumroll please... a reflective vest at all times of the day! I agree with the shirt, boots, and helmet... but needless to say, not a whole lot of us wear our nice shiny reflector vest off base. LOL
 

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I had one big advantage when I started riding immediately after WWII is that there were ONLY street irons of singles, V-twins, vertical twins & a rare flat opposed twin or slopper twin & yes a rare square four.

No sportbikes & no comp irons. We converted the street irons into dirt comp bikes along with modifications to road racing.


Riding gear was a tweed or cloth cap, cloth or leather jacket, jeans or some form of cloth trousers, oxfords to work boots so in reality one could ride to work. in what they were going to use at work, with no more then the addition of a long coat to ward off the rain like a Trench Coat.
 

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Discussion Starter #19
FMAN_DTF said:
i had that situation last october, im was 21, in college, not 100% financially independent, i got a bike using MY money and my parents found out, i ended up sellin the bike...

I graduated in may, right now im volunteering but once i get a job i'll prolly get another bike and tell my parents, if they can't deal w/ it, tough

i had my bike for a few months, i was content in not tellin my parents cause i knew i was gonna catch some hell

you sound like a big boy, im sure you can handle it:2cents:

*side note, my mom has made some friends that ride :D , so hopefully she will be able to handle it alittle better this time around
I actually remember that and went and found the post you had posted it about it. I remembered I had posted something in there and I wanted to see what I said. The only difference is here is that I'm supporting my self 100%. You appeard to still be receiving help. Anyway here is the post

http://sbw.sportbikes.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=39639&perpage=10&pagenumber=3

Thank again guys. I will let you know how it truns out. The parents will see it on Thuresday this week. So it may not be till friday or next week till I get a chance to post again.
 

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EdgeRanger said:
...So it may not be till friday or next week till I get a chance to post again.
That's assuming, of course, that you survive the enounter. :twofinger
 
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