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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
I have been seeing this girl for about a month now, and she has a very annoying ex. The problem is that they're still "friends", what ever the hell that is supposed to mean. This guy calls her at least 10 times a day, leaves countless voice mails, calls her "babe", and won't leave until he recieves a hug. Now, we aren't technically a couple, we just go out a couple times a week, so I guess he can do what ever he wants to try to get her back. But let me ask this, what exactly am I allowed to do in this situation? Ignore it, yell at him, tell him to f*ck off, or try to get him to take a swing at me then beat him to a bloody pulp?

I pitched this story to a friend of mine, and this was his idea. His idea was to get drunk and beat the hell out of this kid. That way I don't lose face in front of the girl for doing it myself. Any thoughts? And trust me, if you met this kid it would be all you could do to not knock him out. I expect nothing but wise and informend responses from the wealth of knowledge that is SBW.:rolleyes:
 

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Bro, from being in the same situation yrs ago. The best thing that you can do is nothing since your not a couple. You could tell her how you feel about it and make it sappy. Now if you 2 were a couple I say kick his little punk interfering azz bad. Just score her as your girl tell the dude off and hope he leaves. Just remember women like the sappy crap, so make it sound heart felt. That is what worked for me, but to think about it.........I wish I would have let him have her back. Phsycochick.
 

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hey Tippy, I thought I saw you post some pics of some kid in a Nintendo jacket holding a little black rifle? I'll tellya what we told one of the guys at work that was worried about guys coming over to see his teenage daughter. Clean that thing at the kitchen table when they come over. Could possibly work in this situation too? :D
Good luck
 

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Tippmann said:
I expect nothing but wise and informend responses from the wealth of knowledge that is SBW.:rolleyes:
If your not a couple, but want to be then you need to TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL!. You really dont have a right to beat the shit out of one of her "friends" simply because they annoy you.:rolleyes: Once everything is out in the open in reguards to your feelings and hers then and only then can you set guidelines-if they are agreed upon by the two of you only!

If she is simply playing the field and wanting to keep her options open then she isnt for you anyway, and you should drop her ass like third period french.....and then IMMEDIATELY go beat the living shit out of the little cock block!:D
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Re: Re: Dealing with the ex boyfriend

maley2000 said:
IMMEDIATELY go beat the living shit out of the little cock block
John, that's all you needed to say.:)
 

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Well, since you're not technically a couple (though do you know what she thinks of how things are going?), you can't get all jealous/posessive, but you can point out that the other guy is. :D
 

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Tippmann said:
I have been seeing this girl for about a month now, and she has a very annoying ex. The problem is that they're still "friends", what ever the hell that is supposed to mean. This guy calls her at least 10 times a day, leaves countless voice mails, calls her "babe", and won't leave until he recieves a hug. Now, we aren't technically a couple, we just go out a couple times a week, so I guess he can do what ever he wants to try to get her back. But let me ask this, what exactly am I allowed to do in this situation? Ignore it, yell at him, tell him to f*ck off, or try to get him to take a swing at me then beat him to a bloody pulp?

I pitched this story to a friend of mine, and this was his idea. His idea was to get drunk and beat the hell out of this kid. That way I don't lose face in front of the girl for doing it myself. Any thoughts? And trust me, if you met this kid it would be all you could do to not knock him out. I expect nothing but wise and informend responses from the wealth of knowledge that is SBW.:rolleyes:
That is the hardest question ever. Is she worth it? Does she get off on the situation? Is he a guy that you would have to fuck up 6 times before he catches on? To many variables.
 

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Re: Re: Dealing with the ex boyfriend

falconeight said:
That is the hardest question ever. Is she worth it? Does she get off on the situation? Is he a guy that you would have to fuck up 6 times before he catches on? To many variables.
very well put, is she worth the agrivation? (most are not)
 

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You obviously dig her, right? Find out how she feels about you two in a non-posessive way, and if she digs you, too, then tell her that you're not too into this other guy.
I had that exact scenario happen in college and when I was working her ex would go to her place to 'hang out'....fat lot of BS. Eventually I had enough, drank a lot of Jager one night, and went to his house. Either he wasn't there or he didn't answer.
Some guys don't know what they've got until it's gone. Other times, and be careful of this: she and this guy might have a pretty strong past. if that's the case, back off from her a bit and see what happens. I never like to get in the way of past history, because maybe they were a good couple and didn't know it until you came into the picture. If they were together for a while, then he still kind of has rights, and she's obviously not saying no if they're still hanging out and talking to each other that much.
My advice: back off and see what happens. Don't be cold to her, but don't be at her beckon call, either, as she might be setting you up for heartache. :2cents: :cool:
 

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Of course Tell her how you feel. If she is insistant on keeping him around, then I guess that lets you know where you stand(get some and go). However, if she agrees hes annoying, Tell her to get a restraining order. That way when he shows up, You can wail on him and from a cops point of view he shouldnt have been there in the first place. YOU WIN!!!
 

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I can't believe no one has pointed out - there is a reason these two broke up in the first place. If you've heard her talk about the things he did wrong, or what she didn't like about him, use that to your advantage. Be everything to her that he wasn't and everything she said she wanted from him, and you'll end up with her popping up with the relationship talk. Then and only then should you bring up the "what about this other douche bag?" if she falls back with something like "he'll get the picture eventually." You'll know she didnt really want him around to begin with, but if she throws out something like "Oh, he's harmless" then you got trouble, because an ex-boyfriend trying to get his girl back is never harmless and she thinks exactly what he wants her to think because he is just waiting for his chance to snatch her back up. I've been on both sides of this a few times, it's a pretty fun game. But it's all about manipulation between you and this guy. Who ever can convince her he is the best guy wins. Have fun.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
wheelie123 said:
she and this guy might have a pretty strong past. if that's the case, back off from her a bit and see what happens.
No, she and the douche only went out for a month before I met her. So there really is no past to speak of.


kranenman said:
However, if she agrees hes annoying, Tell her to get a restraining order.
I'm 22, he's 20. I'd just as soon get him to swing at me then beat the piss outta him. And she does think he's annoying, and tells me that all the time. But she's too nice to just get rid of him all together.


F3Bufford said:
If you've heard her talk about the things he did wrong, or what she didn't like about him, use that to your advantage. Be everything to her that he wasn't and everything she said she wanted from him, and you'll end up with her popping up with the relationship talk.
Good point. I have been doing this to a great extent. She was telling me the reasons they broke up and I made sure to keep away from that type of behavior. Like for 1, he was way too possessive. 2, he was extremely needy. I just make sure not to do that shit, not that I would anyway.


And for the record, I like her too much to say it's not worth the trouble and ditch her. But I can say if we do break up in the near future, I'm going straight to the guys house to have a talk.
 

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It's obvious you dig her man....very cool. Honestly, I wouldn't worry about the guy. She doesn't want to be with him, but she's too nice to say FU....that's a sign of a classy girl, and one I would definitely hold onto. Don't do any of that restraining order bullshit, especially at college. That's one way to gain a bad rep. If you do that, you're only asking for problems at college.
Don't sweat it, man. Have fun with her, and don't worry about the guy. If he crosses lines, then deal with it then and deal with it promptly. Don't be an ass: just explain that it's over between them and you would like him to respect that. Ask him if the roles were reversed how he would feel. (I am not being a weenie when I say this stuff.....just speaking frome experience). If his answers don't meet your approval, ask him if you can speak to him outside and away from other people. At that point I would say very nicely that while I understand that he is hurt and upset, you are starting to get pissed off. And part of being pissed off when it comes to your girl means that you will do whatever it takes to make sure that you and your girl are happy. At that point, ask him if he understands what you mean. If he doesn't, then I would let him know (all of this should be in a very calm voice) that you will wear him out if this behavior continues and you get upset any more.
Man, everyone's been hurt, and getting your heart ripped out sucks. But this guy needs to realize that she's not the only girl out there with one of those, and at college it's a veritable buffet of sex and fun.....he needs to move on and quit screwing with you and her..........ESPECIALLY since they ONLY WENT OUT FOR A MONTH! That's sad, and that guy needs to get some self-respect and move on.
Tippy, don't sweat it. Have fun, and congrats man! :D :cool: :thumb:
 
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