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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:00 PM Thread Starter
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Talking a few chuckles

Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder

1. All the DNA is the same.

2. There are no dental records.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?"

The agent replies, "Just a minute..."

"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.

__________________________________________________ _

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.

"How was he killed?" asked one detective.

"With a golf gun," the other detective replied.

"A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?"

"I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan."

__________________________________________________ __

The investigation of Martha Stewart continues. Her recipe for chicken casserole is quite efficient. First you boil the chicken in water. And

then you dump the stock.

__________________________________________________ __

New Sex Study...

It has been determined that the most used sexual position for
married couples is the doggie position. The husband sits up and begs.

The wife rolls over and plays dead.

__________________________________________________ __

This guy has been sitting in a bar all night, staring at a blonde
wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen. Finally his curiosity gets the best of him, so he walks over and asks, "How do you get into those

pants?"The young woman looks him over and replies, "Well, you could

start by buying me a drink."

__________________________________________________ __

Moe: "My wife got me to believe in religion.

Joe: "Really?"

Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."



__________________________________________________ __

A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling. "I'm O.K. but I didn't like the four-letter-word the
doctor used in surgery," he answered.

"What did he say," asked the nurse.

"OOPS!"


__________________________________________________ __

While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a
display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty
pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.

"What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?"

"Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one."


__________________________________________________ __

Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped the horn by mistake.She turned and looked at him for an explanation.

He said, "I did that by accident."

She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."

He replied, "How did you know?"

She said, "Because you didn't say "asshole!" afterwards



E.

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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:22 PM
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Re: a few chuckles

Quote:
Originally posted by DreamRyder

Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped the horn by mistake.She turned and looked at him for an explanation.

He said, "I did that by accident."

She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."

He replied, "How did you know?"

She said, "Because you didn't say "asshole!" afterwards



E.

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The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all of fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomanical, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully. - Richard Dawkins, The God Delusion
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:27 PM
Some days are like this.
 
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Good ones, E!


"I often wonder why I talk to you, then I realize, although you put me down, you do it with love." - Jester
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:30 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by spicerke
Good ones, E!

yea...E does have a couple of good one
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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Judge
yea...E does have a couple of good one
You wouldn't by any chance be talking about bewbies would you?

SportbikeWorld Supermoderator

The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all of fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomanical, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully. - Richard Dawkins, The God Delusion
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:36 PM
Some days are like this.
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by spicersh
You wouldn't by any chance be talking about bewbies would you?

Yeah, I forgot to thank you, Judge... spicersh has added "bewbies" to his vocabulary, and mutters it at some pretty inopportune times.

"I often wonder why I talk to you, then I realize, although you put me down, you do it with love." - Jester
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-21-2004, 02:58 PM
 
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What's the thread name...a few what??? ha
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-22-2004, 05:05 AM Thread Starter
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judge hun.. you are obssessed with bewbs and now you're spreading it through out SBW

those came from my sis.. she usually comes across some good ones

yeah Bluto I thought of you when I first read that title also

E.

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