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post #1 of 2 (permalink) Old 02-28-2009, 09:54 AM Thread Starter
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Nine Words Women Use

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man... That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying *[email protected] YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

Help control the squid population, have your squid spayed or neutered

"it's not the smart ass behavior that gets to me... it's the dumb ass behavior that is a problem..." -Quote from my Aunt.

Only motorcycle riders understand why dogs stick their head out of car windows.
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post #2 of 2 (permalink) Old 02-28-2009, 09:56 AM Thread Starter
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That doesn't bother me at all, I love doing that: What a girlfriend will say; but a wife never will.

No your friends are cool, I like them a lot: Same as above

No I like that you tend bar, that is such a cool job: Same as above

I want to be independent and pay my own way: Same as above

I am not really sure I want to have kids: Same as above

No I agree she is totally hot; she wears that miniskirt well: Same as above

Your going riding this weekend? Alright be safe and have fun: Same as above

The movies, tonight? Sure what do you want to go and see?: Same as above

Oh my god yes, right there! Same as above


Our money: your paycheck

Her money: her paycheck

Our bank account: Any account with your name on it.

Her bank account: The one you have no idea she has

I be back in a little bit I am going to the store: Him - a pack of smokes. Her - a new dress, shoes, hair styled, pedicure, manicure, lunch with her girlfriends and coffee with her mother for two hours.

Allowance: Something she brings up only when she thinks you are about to spend to much money on something that is not for her.

Budget: Same as above

My son: What she tells the judge

His son: What she tells the cops

I know those are fake: What screams at your new 25 year old girlfriend.

Help control the squid population, have your squid spayed or neutered

"it's not the smart ass behavior that gets to me... it's the dumb ass behavior that is a problem..." -Quote from my Aunt.

Only motorcycle riders understand why dogs stick their head out of car windows.
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