One for Tippy.... and snake - Sportbike Forum: Sportbike Motorcycle Forums
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 06:13 AM Thread Starter
Strength and Honor
 
kanwisch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Central IN
Posts: 6,144
One for Tippy.... and snake

MAKES MY EYES TEAR UP, SUCH A HAPPY ENDING

A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.'

'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife.

'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. I'm going to have a beer.'

The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... '

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be! right back. I promise. OK?'

'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken w ings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.

'But my sweet honey... at the bar. you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...'

'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?'

And....they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?

SportbikeWorld Supermoderator

Dragging knee is for the track, and dragging tail is for the lot. --Kane Friesen

When you're in a car, you're watching a movie; when you're on a bike, you're in the movie. --Robert Pirsig

Identity theft is not Fun
kanwisch is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 07:18 AM
Lifetime Premium
 
snakesht's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Springfield, OH
Posts: 3,449
Send a message via AIM to snakesht
Thank you for adding to my list of reasons not to get hitched

"The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets."
-Will Rogers
snakesht is offline  
post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 07:26 AM
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 166
I actually could hear a voice while reading that.
apuddy is offline  
 
post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 07:53 AM Thread Starter
Strength and Honor
 
kanwisch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Central IN
Posts: 6,144
Quote:
Originally Posted by snakesht View Post
Thank you for adding to my list of reasons not to get hitched
I'm always happy to contribute to removal of your genes from the pool

SportbikeWorld Supermoderator

Dragging knee is for the track, and dragging tail is for the lot. --Kane Friesen

When you're in a car, you're watching a movie; when you're on a bike, you're in the movie. --Robert Pirsig

Identity theft is not Fun
kanwisch is offline  
post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 08:11 AM
Lifetime Premium
 
snakesht's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Springfield, OH
Posts: 3,449
Send a message via AIM to snakesht
Ouch

"The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets."
-Will Rogers
snakesht is offline  
post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 08:13 AM Thread Starter
Strength and Honor
 
kanwisch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Central IN
Posts: 6,144
Quote:
Originally Posted by snakesht View Post
Ouch
And here I thought you'd come back with a witty, "Don't need to be married to have kids."

SportbikeWorld Supermoderator

Dragging knee is for the track, and dragging tail is for the lot. --Kane Friesen

When you're in a car, you're watching a movie; when you're on a bike, you're in the movie. --Robert Pirsig

Identity theft is not Fun
kanwisch is offline  
post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 08-05-2008, 08:38 AM
Lifetime Premium
 
snakesht's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Springfield, OH
Posts: 3,449
Send a message via AIM to snakesht
thought about it, but the sting was too great

"The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets."
-Will Rogers
snakesht is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Sportbike Forum: Sportbike Motorcycle Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome