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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-17-2007, 04:53 PM Thread Starter
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Critics of the Military

BP - This one's right up your strasse


The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

Terrorists themselves have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide."

The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Chumley

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading"

"Flying is easy... You just have to throw yourself at the ground and miss"
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-17-2007, 04:58 PM
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Loved it,
The French bit cracks me up!!

Apparently the tropps in Afganistan aren't get enough support in fighting the insurgency and poppy growers.

Said Corporal Tony " blow" Harris. "Yeah man! We ran out of rolling papers weeks ago! The goverment just doesn;t care"

Had to use my step ladder to change a light bulb cos i don't get on with my real ladder.
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-17-2007, 05:00 PM
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Re: Critics of the Military

Quote:
Originally posted by Chumley
BP - This one's right up your strasse


The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

Terrorists themselves have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.


HEY! Im a limey!

funny post, mate
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-17-2007, 05:01 PM
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Re: Critics of the Military

Quote:
Originally posted by Chumley
...Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide."

The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability...
LMFAO!




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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-18-2007, 06:33 PM
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Re: Re: Critics of the Military

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Originally posted by Firefox

HEY! Im a limey!
Not a farking another one.......

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-18-2007, 07:52 PM Thread Starter
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oi oi saveloy

Easy there GD....

Chumley

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading"

"Flying is easy... You just have to throw yourself at the ground and miss"
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-18-2007, 09:15 PM
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And if you look into the actual name Limey you'll realise that you and all your ancestors are in fact limeys GD

Had to use my step ladder to change a light bulb cos i don't get on with my real ladder.
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-19-2007, 03:58 AM
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I think I prefer 'convict' thanks very much

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-19-2007, 06:30 AM
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lmao
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-19-2007, 01:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Gixxer_Dave
I think I prefer 'convict' thanks very much
So that was your ancestors that my ancestors came to Australia to build "gaols" for?!




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