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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:16 PM Thread Starter
 
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Slash the Crash

SBR CID are conducting an internal enquiry to an incident that occured at turn one Pasir Gudang last Sunday involving Slasher Perkins.

We need eyewitnesses to step forward for which we will guarantee anonymity and enter you into the witness protection scheme.

All calls will be treated in the strictest confidence.
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:21 PM Thread Starter
 
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SLASHERS STATEMENT

According to Slasher, the reason that he binned it was because of an oil slick from the stricken tanker "Prestiege" which sank last week off Northern Spain.

Apparently the oil slick reached Turn One at about 11:00 hrs Sunday Morning .......

Last edited by Blue Catt; 11-26-2002 at 04:46 PM.
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:23 PM
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Are the Slasher and Slashermobile in one piece??

Sounds like P.G has had it's fair share of fallers lately Then again with reports of oil, busa's, jeans and sneakers etc it's no wonder.....

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:27 PM Thread Starter
 
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ACCIDENT RECONSTRUCTION

This one going out to Legend......

Slasher says that Malik didn't manage to get any data logging done when he binned it. Consequently will be looking for an accident re-construction and need a volunteer.

Using shagged tyres, you will be required to accelerate up to about 175 kph down the main straight and without breaking attempt to negotiate turn one. Mid corner braking will be encouraged to ensure that resulting low side is fully effective.

Malik will be positioned on the inside of turn one to record this, and who knows, if you do a really good job then we may induct you to the SBR hall of fame.
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:29 PM
 
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Naaah

Lizard saliva.

Its a well known fact that the realatively small lizard of the Johor region produces an abnormal amount of saliva. This reaches enormous proportions when the little fella is subjected to excessive noise and petrol fumes.

Musta been the lizard. I cant think of any other explanation!

( For those doubting Thomas's..it had nothin to do with TUG doin a relaxed 1:46 last time there. Oh No! nothing at all)
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:29 PM Thread Starter
 
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Grizzly Adams

Yeah he's ok.

Apparently he was very touched by the flowers we sent him .... great poof !!
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 04:33 PM
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You stole two seconds off me ya bastid

It was a high 144

There is a lot more to come
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 05:25 PM
 
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S'funny.........he told me that he did it on purpose to make everyone feel better about themselves Season of Goodwill an' all that!!

Either that or he wanted his bike to match his leathers

I've told him that getting his ear down is going a bit far.

Mrs Crash
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 10:22 PM
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The Crashed Slash

For The SBR CID who have knocked twice now, I am afraid all I can tell you is ...I was down the Bingo governor.....didn't see nought.......

However my statement, if pressed further and you can provide adequate protection, will be as follows:

I was proceeding in Southerly direction at the junction of Turn One and Pit Exit at approximately 10:42 hrs on the morning of the accident, when I saw a man acting suspiciously in the gravel trap a few metres to the left of me.

The man was dresssed in blue leather, bald and had a mean yet slightly devious look about him. Like he sold insurance or something. As this was somewhat unusual occurance, I decided to stop my vehicle and parked it to one side of the pit lane on the soft mud and take a closer look.

At first the man laid still holding his arms up to the sky shaking his fists angrily muttering obscenties but as he became aware of my presence he seemed to scury behind the fallen motorcycle and keep perfectly still and quiet. It was as if the man intended not to be seen. I became more suspicious when I noticed the vehicle was cleverly disguised in clumps of grass and small mounds of gravel to make it blend in with its surroundings.

I'm not sure what happened next as my own vehicle's side stand was plunging through the soft mud like a knife throigh butter and I was forced to save my own bike from a similar fate.

By the time I got back to the scene, the man was wrestling with the dazed vehicle and it was quite apparent he was holding the bike against its will which had clearly been through some rough ordeal in the hands of this ruthless man and wanted to stay put.

He man handled the machine over to where I was standing and told me he knew where I lived, no one needed to know about this, he was quite 'handy' if I knew what he meant , I needed to purchase a couple of life assurance policies, and if I went to the authorities or mentioned the word 'low-side' in his presence the same thing would happen to me as it did The Commercial Union Group!
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 11-26-2002, 10:26 PM Thread Starter
 
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Top Post that One !!

Nice one Boycie

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